Just in case you thought girls got all the fun...

How better to say "I love my country" than getting knee-deep in manure with your shiny new cowboy boots?

Stomp around

Ah, fall. Time to head out in the crisp air and stomp through mud puddles in 5" platforms emblazoned with Old Glory.

Let the eagle soar...

The way the paint shines on this thing, it reminds me of something.

And by "something", I mean the way animals look when they're rescued from oil spills.

This diamond ring doesn't shine for me anymore...

I can only imagine how much one of these would hurt in a fist fight.

A restful night's sleep

This is the fabric equivalent of your neighbor blaring Lynyrd Skynyrd at 12:30a. Fine on special occasions, cruising for a lawsuit - or at least a strongly worded letter from the Neighborhood Association - the rest of the time.

Out of curiosity...

Why is there a velociraptor on the flag?

On a rampage

I have no words.

This is just car-crash amazing.